One thing I have always wanted to do was write a children's book.  Today, this goal became a reality as my self-published ebook became available on Barnes&Noble.com.  Hawaii has always been a special part of my past.  The fire in Maui was absolutely devastating.  I wanted to help, so I decided to dedicate this ebook and however much profit it makes to the Maui Strong Fund.  One problem I had to overcome was my lack of true artistry - however, the development of AI solved that problem.  I am proud of this first attempt into children's literature.  I strived to not only entertain, but also to teach a lesson.  Adult's find it hard to talk to children about things that are hard, like grieving and devastation.  It is my hope this book helps guide parents in these discussions when things happen in life that is hard.  Children shouldn't be kept in the dark, they fill in the blanks on their own - and usually come up with some weird conclusion that they are at fault.  We need to teach our children empathy, and how to grieve by watching us and talking about things that are hard.  If this book helps in any way, please let me know.  I hope to share Lullah & Odie's next adventure soon.  

A note to all my elementary Parents:

I just returned from a weekend visit in Kansas City with my girls who are at KU & Mizzou (I know...I know... that’s crazy, but any of you who have more than one child understand how different siblings can be).  Anyway, I was reflecting on their educational journey, and  I wanted to share a few insights about these magical years and let you know how blessed we are here at TIS to be part of your children's educational journey.

Children are literally little sponges, soaking up the world around them at a phenomenal rate. Science has shown that a child’s brain during the elementary years is growing, connecting and learning more actively than any other time in their lives. Our challenge, in education, is to maximize this critical time period. 
How do we best help our children learn?  This is the million dollar question for educators.  In today’s world, there appears to be a million possible answers.  Here at Independent, we believe in engagement to spark the love of learning. This year our teachers have taken on a new and challenging curriculum in the Lower School.  I wish you all could hear our veteran teachers’ conversations about how much they love teaching the National Geographic curriculum. They describe how excited and engaged the students are in the topics. The integration of Social Studies, and Science into the English/Language Arts areas of Reading, Spelling and Writing have students working at a deeper level of critical thinking.  In fact, I wanted to share with you some highlights from our Star Reading & Math results.  These tests not only help us know exactly where your student is, but also how we are doing as a group as compared on a National level.

Highlights as of the end of October 2019:  

        #1) Grades 1-5  median percentile is 82% in Star Reading (this means our students are        
                    performing at a rate higher than 82% of the rest of the students who have taken Star Reading nationally).
       #2) Grades 1-5  median percentile is 86% in Star Math (this means, as a group, our 
                   students are performing at a rate higher than 86% of the rest of the students who have
                   taken Star Math Nationally).
      #3) Most grades (1-5) are reading at least one full grade equivalent above and some up 
              to two grades (this means they are reading at a level typical of those at least one to two grades above them).    
      #4) 3rd grade’s median is 4.5 grade equivalent in Math (this means as a group, our 3rd 
              grade is performing at a level typical of other mid year 4th graders are performing nationally on this same test).  
      #5) 4th grade’s median is over a 6.4 grade equivalent in Math (this means as a group, our 
            4th grade is performing at a median level typical of other mid year 6th graders are performing Nationally on this test). 
      #6) 5th grade’s median is over an 8.1 grade equivalent in Math (this means as a group our  
            5th grade is performing at a median level typical of 8th graders on this test). 


Obviously, we believe in academic rigor, but also in surrounding students with a safe, loving and nurturing environment. Last week I was visiting a new teacher’s classroom when one of our students who has been diagnosed with Dyslexia and struggles in reading, boldly raised her hand in class and read a paragraph out loud.  This small gesture spoke volumes regarding the safe and comfortable classroom environment this teacher has created. Your students are in loving and capable hands. Our teachers humble me daily with their passion, talent, and professionalism.

We also believe in the power of play.  Research shows how important play is in our busy society.  Screen-time is not equal to play time. Our children must have non-structured times where they dream, role-play, and interact socially with others.  It is critical for their development! They learn to get along with others, take turns, deal with disappointment, and how to persevere. Our job as parents and educators is to give them the time and space to let the magic happen.  As many of you may know, we only have one scheduled recess for each grade, but every teacher is encouraged to take students outside for extra recess as often as needed. Sometimes, those tricky teachers may carry out a bucket of chalk, manipulatives, or even shaving cream to the playground.  The students believe they are just playing, but in reality, they have embarked on a multi-sensory S.T.E.M or S.T.E.A.M self-directed lesson - (pure magic!)  

If I had one wish to share with parents of our younger children, it would be the wish for you to play.  Lay on the floor with them. Put away the phones, ipads, or television for a while. Engage in their role playing.  Create. Play time is never wasted - it is a critical part of their development. When you are visiting them in college in a few short years, those are the times that will be fondly remembered. 
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Thank you for doing life with us here at Independent.  We are honored to be a part of this magical time in your child’s development!  If you ever have any questions or concerns, do not hesitate to call or stop by the office.  

Sincerely --
Alyssa Boyer 

Change.  Even mentioning that word opens the floodgate of emotion ​for many people.  Why?  

Change can be very uncomfortable.  It is an unknown...maybe even scary.  How do we know it's the right decision?  If we just keep going down the same path, we can expect the same outcome.  If that is not a positive outcome, then change is necessary.  Life is full of mazes; how do we know which way to turn?  Sometimes I wish I had a magic mirror to reveal the future in order to make decisions in the present.  Of course, I don't -- so how do we make peace with a decision to change things like employment, relationships, schools, or even just moving to a different neighborhood.  These are tough decisions -- no doubt about it -- and for some people may even be paralyzing.

Rogers categorized people's willingness and ability to adopt change in their lives (see below).  As you can see, there are about 15% of people who love to jump in with both feet when change comes around -- these are the "Innovators & Early Adopters", the "Early Majority" may have a few questions, but are easily swayed to get on board.  The next group, "Late Majority" takes a little more convincing.  They are a little harder to budge -- then the final 16% "The Laggards" really struggle with moving toward change.  Where do you fit in these categories, typically? 

Knowing where you fit is eye opening.  Think of big changes that have happened in your life recently.  How did you respond?  Were you on board and encouraging others, or did you dig your heels in declaring, "If it ain't broke, don't try to fix it!"  In my case, I'd have to say it depends on the situation.  At home, I typically fall into the late majority group. For example, it took a couple of years for me to be convinced to acquire a puppy.  At work, however, I am solidly a member of the Early Adopters.  I love innovation and thinking out of the box.  However, it's easy to get frustrated when others aren't as willing to change.  As a leader, I have to pause and think about the groupings above.  Is it the idea certain people are resisting, or are they just struggling with change.  Taking the time, answering all the questions, listening to concerns, these all help other to move into a positive change pattern.

Understanding our personal level of comfort with Change is the first step in making peace with it.  Being able to step back from an issue and ask ourselves WHY we are feeling resistant, emotional, or overwhelmed.  We may have even blasted our emotions out onto others, but we need to stop and search inside to find the source.  Once the source of emotion is found -- the steps toward change come a little easier. 

The Sea of Change is an entity we all meet in our lives.  Making Peace with Change certainly calms the waves of our emotions and makes for a much smoother trip!

​

                              -- Photo credit Tobie Andrews (2004)

​Honestly, I am not a country music fan, but I happened upon this song the other day.  Needless to say, 15 minutes later, I wiped my tears and tried to compose myself.  It's just absolutely true!

Last night was our Lower School Carnival.  I couldn't help but flashback to when my kids were little, excitedly bouncing from room to room -- fishing for prizes, getting their faces painted, or winning the grand prize "Snot Shot" gun (which actually made my, then, 8 year old son break down into tears of joy!) However, lurking alongside those snapshots as a young mom, are memories of being overwhelmed, exhausted, and even irritated!  I remember thinking, is there something wrong with me?  Why is this so hard?  

​Looking back, I can see what a gift those years were. Did I enjoy them?  I think so, I remember being very busy SURVIVING them, much of the time.  Parenting is difficult.  Don't get me wrong -- being a mom is the hardest job I ever loved so much!  Looking around at our parents at the carnival, many of them volunteering, after they had already put in a full day's work.  The students literally bouncing off the walls.  The excitement actually crackling in the air as they dragged their parents all the way from the DJ, to the petting zoo.  What a precious night! -- I saw my own babies in every one of their faces.  I also saw myself 15 years ago trying to locate & corral all three of my kiddos, only to head home for an hour of reading books, singing songs, and rubbing backs till they all fell asleep.  I realize now that it is normal to be overwhelmed, sometimes.  Being a mom can be flat out exhausting, but it's worth every single minute!  

I remember my own mom telling me not to "wish my life away," as I couldn't wait to get to college and "start" living. I, of course, believed her to be bordering on crazy - so why in the world should I listen to her?  However, I find myself saying the same things to my kids, as they yearn to be on their own, fantasize about their weddings, or declare their future babies' names.  Striving to remind them gently that their life is happening NOW!  Please don't miss it!  Enjoy it!   

These days, I don't hear "sing just one more song, Mommy." My evenings of trying to skip pages so my head could hit the pillow five minutes earlier, are long behind me.  So my wish for you is to cherish every single page (they will catch you anyway).  Live in the now!  Don't get caught up comparing yourself to the carefully contrived virtual life of others on social media. Forgive yourself when you become overwhelmed and your fuse is a little short. Finally, even though she is not around to enjoy this, I have to end this blog with three words that will always be difficult to say out loud: "MOM WAS RIGHT!"